BE NOT TOXIC!

Thich Nhat Nanh, Fidelity: How to Create a Loving Relationship That Lasts (Berkeley: Parallax Press, 2011) ("With the practice of mindfulness, we can recognize the habitual nature of our desire. . . ." When we're able to smile at a provocation or direct our sexual energy towards something positive, we can be aware of our ability, appreciate it, and continue in this way. The key is to be aware of our actions. Our mindfulness will help us understand where our actions are coming from." "If we aren't yet able to transform that habit energy, we will come out of the prison of one relationship only to fall into the prison of another. . . . We are the victims of our own habits. The way we think, speak, and act has not changed. What we did to cause suffering to the first person, we now do to cause suffering to someone new, and create a second hell." "But if we are aware of our actions, we can decide whether or not they are beneficial and if not, we can decide not to repeat them" Id. at 28-29. "The Buddha said, 'Do not have faith in something because a famous spiritual teacher said it. Do not have faith in something because it was recorded in scriptures. Do not have faith in something because everyone believes in it. Do not have faith in something because it is laid down in custom. Hearing something, we should examine it closely, comprehend it, and apply it. If, when we apply it, there is a result, then we can have faith in it. If there is no result, then we should not have faith in it just because of custom, scripture, or some spiritual teacher.'" Id. at 96-97.).