I HAVE BEEN MY OWN WORST ENEMY. ALWAYS!

Jon Kabat-Zinn, Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Mediation in Everyday Life (10th Anniversary Edition) (New York: Hyperion, 1994, 2005) ("The romantic notion is that if it's no good over here, you have only to go over there and things will be different. If this job is no good, change jobs. If this wife is no good, change wives. If this town is no good, change towns. If these children are a problem, leave them for other people to look after. The underlying thinking is that the reason for your troubles is outside of you--in the location, in others, in the circumstances. Change the location, change the circumstances, and everything will fall into place; you can start over, have a new beginning." "The trouble with this way of seeing is that it conveniently ignores the fact that you carry your head and your heart, and what some would call your 'karma' around with you. You cannot escape yourself, try as you might. And what reason, other than pure wishful thinking, would you have to suspect that things would be different or better somewhere else anyway? Sooner or later, the same problems would arise if in fact they stem in large part from your patterns of seeing, thinking and behaving. Too often, our lives cease working because we cease working at life, because we are unwilling to take responsibility for things as they are, to work with our difficulties. We don't understand that it is actually possible to attain clarity, understanding, and transformation right in the middle of what is here and now, however problematic it may be. But is is easier and less threatening to our sense of self to project our involvement in our problems onto other people and the environment." Id. at 195-196. I shall strive to be nontoxic.).